The Machine Girl (2008)

I'll be honest with you, however this movie turned out, I would have given it at least one star for the cover artwork alone. Yes, I'm a twisted pervert, but at least I admit it! As it turns out though there is no chance of giving this joyous and warped exercise in reckless abandon a bad review. It has is faults, yet these are far outweighed by all the juicy goodness contained in it.

Ami is a loving sister, and thinks the world of her brother. The two of them have been looking after each other since the death of their parents a few years before. Unfortunately he, along with his friend, has become the victim of the local group of bullies which is run by the son of the local Yakuza boss. Unable to make the payments demanded of him the gang mercilessly kill the two friends, leaving Ami heartbroken and fueled with the sort of vengeance you can only imagine.

After a little research she hightails it to the residence of the Yakuza boss and his son in order to get some payback. However, this doesn't go quite according to plan and, although she does kick a little ass, she ends up losing an arm.

United in their grief Ami befriends the mother of the other victim, and through the wonders of modern mechanics ends up with a replacement arm, which as you might be able to guess from the cover art is a high powered machine gun. The two of them then set forth to finish of the job Ami tried to start beforehand.

The Machine Girl truly is a wonderous movie to behold; wall to wall bloodshed and gore, a nasty sense of humour and a hot, hot lead actress. It is almost cartoon-like in its approach, this isn't the violence of movies such as Hostel or any other number of the so-called torture porn sub-genre. You will be howling with laughter, as opposed to wincing in pain, as the bodies get sliced and diced, and deep fried.

There is the odd moment where there is a little dodgy CGI, but for the most part this movie relies on practical effects, with gallons of blood which seems to cover absolutely everything. My only other concern about this movie was some of the acting. For the most part it was pretty good, with most of the characters being played completely over-the-top, but there was, on occasion, some seemingly strained dialogue. Who really gives a shit though? This movie is all about the action, and boy does it deliver in that department. I could go on about how much fun this flick is, instead though I will just recommend that you go and watch it right now.

Still reading this? Go, I said, and watch this movie. It is quite possibly the most fun you can have without getting arrested!

Rating 3.5 stars (out of 4)

Review by Jude Felton